President William Taft has officially had it up to here with all you haters and he's sick of this shit.
President William Taft Riding a Badger
Yes. It's President Taft on a badger.
My Twitter Exchange with Richard M. Nixon
So apparently, Richard M. Nixon has a surprisingly active twitter account. I decided to forward him my portrait of him. This was his response.
@dick_nixon Dear Sir. Here is a portrait of you with an octopus on your head. Please enjoy. http://t.co/XU4PJnzXA0 #veeptopus
— jonccrow (@jonccrow) September 27, 2014Jesus. @leclzeppelin @KStreetHipster @cindynorth1 @Elizabeth_Calo @preraphaelitte https://t.co/CdqqDs1S9Q
— Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) September 27, 2014The drug culture, sir. We saw it coming. MT @dick_nixon: Jesus. @leclzeppelin @KStreetHipster @cindynorth1 https://t.co/3bL4V3ISg8
— Tom Nichols (@TheWarRoom_Tom) September 27, 2014For the record, my drug of choice is the same as Nixon's -- whiskey.
The Veeptopus Store: You Want Veeps? We Got Veeps.
That's right. After posting one vice president every weekday, I finally reached Biden last week. And this past weekend, I got all the drawings up on the Veeptopus Etsy site. So if you're dying to decorate your abode with prints of a cephalopod-bedecked Walter Mondale, now is your chance.
47. Joe Biden: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
47. Joe Biden
President: Barak Obama, 2009-2017
Party: Democrat
State: Delaware
Joe Biden grew up with a pronounced stutter. The famously talkative veep was only able to fully overcome it when he was in law school.
46. Dick Cheney: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
46. Dick Cheney
President: George W. Bush, 2001-2009
Party: Republican
State: Wyoming
Shot 78 year-old man in the face. The man, Texas lawyer Harry Whittington, later apologized for inconveniencing the Vice President.
45. Al Gore: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
45. Al Gore
President: Bill Clinton, 1993-2001
Party: Democrat
State: Tennessee
Al Gore won a Grammy, an Oscar and a Nobel Peace Prize. He also won the popular vote in the 2000 Presidential Election, but he didn’t actually win the presidency. Long story.
John C. Breckinridge and International Talk Like A Pirate Day
I am really excited to learn this morning that Veeptopus has been named as one of the Five Things You Had to See Online This Week by Studio 360. You can read the article here.
But what I really want to talk about is pirates. Today September 19, has been dubbed by some august and serious-mind body International Talk Like a Pirate Day. So arrrrgh! And there was at least one vice president out there who had first hand experience with pirates - John C. Breckinridge.
Breckinridge is America’s youngest ever vice president under James Buchanan, who largely ignored him. When Lincoln was elected, Breckinridge returned to being a senator for Kentucky until 1861 when he jumped ship for the Confederacy. The U.S. government was not happy about his decision. The U.S. Senate cast him out by a vote of 36-0 and charged him with treason. Breckinridge was made a Brigadier General for the South, and after distinguishing himself in battles like Shiloh and Chattanooga, he was eventually appointed the Secretary of War. So when General Lee’s army surrendered in 1865, he knew he had to get out of town or face his treason charges.
Breckinridge fled through the malarial, alligator-infested swamps of Florida, hi-jacked a sailing ship (which is a pretty piratey thing to do) and made for Cuba. Along the way, he not only fought off an honest-to-God pirate attack, but he also survived two tropical storms and came close to starving before eventually making it to shore. From there he traveled to England. In 1868, President Andrew Johnson pardoned Breckinridge and all other Confederates.
You can check out a print of Breckinridge and many others over at the Veeptopus Etsy Store.
44. Dan Quayle: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
44. Dan Quayle
President: George H.W. Bush, 1989-1993
Party: Republican
State: Indiana
Dan Quayle is perhaps best remembered for picking a fight with Murphy Brown, a ficitious character, and for inadvertently teaching America that the word “potato” is not spelled with an “e.”
43. George H. W. Bush: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
43. George H.W. Bush
President: Ronald Reagan, 1981-1989
Party: Republican
State: Texas
During his 1988 presidential campaign, George H. W. Bush revealed that he had a closer relationship with his boss that previously suspected. “For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan,” he told reporters. “We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex...uh...setbacks.”
42. Walter Mondale: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
42. Walter F. Mondale
President: Jimmy Carter, 1977-1981
Party: Democrat
State: Minnesota
During his 1984 presidential campaign, Walter Mondale promised to tell the truth. “Mr. Reagan will raise taxes, and so will I. He won’t tell you. I just did.” He was right. Reagan did go on to raise taxes. Mondale lost the election by a landslide.
41. Nelson Rockefeller: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
41. Nelson Rockefeller
President: Gerald Ford, 1974-1977
Party: Republican
State: New York
Nelson Rockefeller went out in style. In 1979, the 70-year-old former VP suffered a heart attack while canoodling with his 25-year-old assistant. Hoping to cover up this untoward scene, his minions delayed calling an ambulance for an hour in order to make it look like he died while reading. The ruse failed.
40. Gerald Ford: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
40. Gerald Ford
President: Richard M. Nixon, 1973-1974
Party: Republican
State: Michigan
Gerald Ford is the only person aside from Frank Underwood to ascend to the nation’s highest office without getting elected as either President or Vice President.
Behold! More Veeps!
The Veeptopus store. Now with more veeps. Check it out. You'll find lots of prints of your favorite cephalopod-bedecked vice president. Impress your friends and maybe that special person in your life.
39. Spiro Agnew: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
39. Spiro Agnew
President: Richard M. Nixon, 1969-1973
Party: Republican
State: Maryland
During his tenure, Agnew regularly attacked the press, memorably calling them the "nattering nabobs of negativism." Talk show host Dick Cavett, in return, pointed out that an anagram of Spiro Agnew’s name is “grow a penis.” In 1973, Agnew was indicted for tax evasion and became only the second VP, after John C. Calhoun, to resign from office. Ten months later, his boss Richard Nixon, resigned too.
38. Hubert H. Humphrey: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
38. Hubert H. Humphrey
President: Lyndon B. Johnson, 1965-1969
Party: Democrat
State: Minnesota
According to Antoly Dobrynin, the Soviet Ambassador to the States, the USSR was so worried that Richard Nixon might win the 1968 election that they secretly offered to help out the Humphrey campaign – even offering financial aid. Humphrey wisely declined the offer.
37. Lyndon B. Johnson: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
37. Lyndon B. Johnson
President: John F. Kennedy
Party: Democrat
State: Texas
Lyndon B. Johnson might have been a very effective legislator but he was also a spectacularly crass man. He named his penis “Jumbo" and on numerous occasions flashed it at horrified colleagues, aides and reporters while conducting meetings on the toilet.
Hark! The Veeptopus Store is Open for Business
Want to celebrate vice presidents, those bronze medalists of American history? You want feel as cool as an octopus? Want to impress that cephalopod enthusiast in your life? Then check out the Veeptopus store at Etsy or just click above at where it reads "Shop." You'll be glad you did.
36. Richard M. Nixon: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
36. Richard Nixon
President: With Dwight D. Eisenhower, 1953-1961
Party: Republican
State: California
In 1957, Nixon went to Latin America for a good will tour. It didn’t go well. Nixon’s motorcade was showered with rocks in Venezuela and Peru. When some guy spat in Nixon’s face in Lima, he kicked him in the shin.
35. Alben W. Barkley: Vice Presidents with Octopuses on Their Heads
35. Alben W. Barkley
President: Harry S Truman, 1949-1953
Party: Democrat
State: Kentucky
Barkley’s grandson reportedly came up with the nickname “Veep” when Barkley complained that the title “Vice President of the United States” was too long.